Wagon ambush results in dead driver
By Wylie Frey
A wagon rode into Armadillo this week moving quickly. The driver seemed more preoccupied with followers than driving the wagon straight, having nearly ran over a resident. It was soon learned that the man driving the wagon was not the original driver, but the shotgun messenger hired to protect the wagon. The original driver was killed just before the wagon reached Armadillo. “A fella threw a fire bottle at the wagon and it hit the driver,” the shotgun messenger said, “nothing I could do, he just burned and dropped off the wagon.” The shotgunner said he was hired by the the recently arrived J and that the job was to protect the cargo. The driver was also hired for the job. Though it is unknown what was being hauled, it is believed the cargo was very valuable as a result of the dozens of attackers the shotgunner said they went through. No attackers followed the wagon into the town. The goods were promptly loaded onto a heavily guarded train and moved out of Armadillo.

Ginseng farmer complains about trespassers
By Jane Duran
A local farmer has complained to law enforcement that cowpokes regularly trespass onto his property and steal his ginseng. “Ginseng is a powerful herb, that’s why I grow it,” the farmer said, “I grow enough for myself, not for sell or trade.” However, he said he has been unable to harvest enough even for his own consumption. “Folks just ride in and take the ginseng without so much as a thank you,” the farmer complained. It did not take a lot of research to find out that this particular farm was marked on several maps as a “location of plentiful ginseng.” How the location of a private farm became a well known location shared among traveling cowpokes is unknown.

WANTED!

Investigators: Travel the Five States and report on what is going on.
Writers: Write the stories investigators find!
Photographers:
To take photographs to be used in the Herald.
Can also do all three!

Apply today!

Federal authorities looking into hallucinogenic herb found in Tall Trees
By Daisy Fairman
An herb referred to as Harrietum Officinalis, named after Harriet Davenport who is believed to have discovered the herb. The herb is said to be able to provide the user a sense of being an animal, or at minimum, seeing the spirits of animals they have become “one” with. Federal authorities became interested in the herb when they learned of its recreational nature. “The herb is not medicinal, it is purely for enjoyment,” said a federal agent, “and therefore, not necessary and should be subject to taxation.” How the government will tax an herb grown in the wild is unknown. It is likely that the federal government’s interest is an effort to reduce the likelihood of sophisticated growing operations. “I suspect that until the taxman can figure out how to tax what one plucks from the ground themselves, they will only be able to tax sellers,” said an official speaking under a condition of anonymity. Harriet Davenport said such government regulation over the herb is ridiculous and not at all what she expected upon discovery. “More people should use it, not less,” she said.

Bounty brought in alive, but ill
By Van R. Seldon
A wanted man was brought into Annesburg coughing up blood, though the bounty hunter claimed to have not harmed the man at all. “I found him half dead, thought he was sleeping,” the bounty hunter said. It was soon learned that the bounty target had been camped out near Elysium Pool, where he had been drinking the water and hunting the local wildlife. It has long been known that something is wrong with that particular water source, which has resulted in local animals being covered in mange. Few people have been desperate enough to use the region as a food and water source, so few instances of human poisoning have occurred. New Hanover authorities claimed to have investigated the area previously and determined the area to be safe. No new investigation is planned.

Shooting contest plagued by accusations of performance enhancing drugs
By Emery Cosberry
An organization called Free Roam Eventeers has been accused of allowing drugs, specifically focus enhancing tonics, to be used freely during its official events. Participants say this allows cowpokes with nearly endless resources to easily dominate these events. “Focusing takes effort and energy, run out of that energy and the effort required becomes even greater,” said one man, “when I rely on my focus too much I can feel my core drain.” So called tonic abusers are able to overcome this drain by steadily drinking tonics before the effects run out. “It’s a careful process,” said a tonic abuser who wished to remain anonymous. “It’s best to have a hearty meal before you tonic up, big game meat with your pick of seasonings or a really good stew will set you up right,” they said before elaborating, “then the key is to tonic up before you feel tired, that way you never drain your inner core.” He explained that this strategy has enabled him to win many events from bow shooting to horse riding. “Doesn’t help much with fishing contests, so I don’t really do those,” they admitted. They also explained that tonics can do much more than replenish one’s focus.

“You get the right tonic and you can replenish your health and even overcome fatigue,” the tonic abuser said, “there’s even tonics that help you with health, fatigue, and focus at the same time.” The Free Roam Eventeers stated that, “tonics are not illegal in any of the territories in which we hold events, nor is there evidence that such tonics really improve the user’s performance.” For now, participants have had to adjust by securing tonics of their own to use. “I ain’t a cheater, but I also ain’t one to be left behind,” said a reluctant tonic user, “if I don’t use them I am at a disadvantage and that ain’t fair.” Federal and state authorities have both declined to comment about tonic use. The BHTNC, who has partnered with Free Roam Eventeers, also declined to comment.

Witches Live Among Us?
By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
They often say Saint-Denis is a city unlike any other. That’s probably true; it has more supernatural stories associated with it than possibly any other major city in the United States.  You can find stories of mass murderers, vampires, ghosts, and demons alike within one block.  The denizens are never at rest, metaphorically and often literally.  The latest stories are about the most hated of all women, witches.

There has been a steady trickle of witch sightings over the years.  In West Elizabeth, they gather at dusk.  In Ambarino, they brew potions, ready to seduce or kill the godly citizens of these lands.  A wanderer known as the Kamassa Witch has been reported dead many times ago, yet continues to be seen.  But these stories are strongest in Saint-Denis, where rumor holds that a rich mansion is home to an entire nest of the devil’s daughters.

The building is called Buckner Mansion; nobody knows where the name came from.  It’s supposedly as old as Saint-Denis itself.  Officially it operates as a boarding school for gifted young girls, but the definition of gifted seems to change depending on who’s talking.

All the girls wear black and rarely are seen in public.  The headmistress is a kindly older woman who seems to go by the name Lady Goode.  This may sound normal to you, dear reader, but trust me when I say the locals do not agree.

The school has few neighbors, most of the nearby houses are left vacant.  Owners come and quickly go within a few short months.  All sorts of strange activities are talked about in hushed tones.  Whispered words on the wind, mysterious lights, people who enter and never leave. 

Hunter’s report seeing a small but cheerful woman out in the woods, always appearing when the mists roll in.  Many call her the Misty One, as misty as the day this earth was created, so I’ve been told.  All sightings also note she wears a shawl, for reasons I can’t begin to tell you.  Unlike a fabled ghost in the area, this woman converses with people.  She’s said to be helpful until you kill an animal.  Most seem to believe she is the head of this so-called coven of witches.

Are any of these stories true?  Do the daughters of Salem walk the streets and forests?  Personally, I think its suppositious farmers terrified at the thought of groups of women being left alone.  But this land was never quite normal, nor ever will be.  The things you see out here can so easily make the mind wonder about this land of opportunity.

New submarine becomes first to travel for “substantial” distance under water
By Frederick Vannesse
John Philip Holland has secured for himself a place in the history books with his nearly two hour submarine voyage. Holland has been working on submarine designs for over two decades, with his first designs being deemed unworkable by the U.S. Navy in 1875. Holland managed to secure funding through a partnership with a revolutionary group. Though he went on his own, the funding allowed him to improve his designs. Previous submarine designs could not viably operate under, thus many governments became skeptical of submarines ever working. However, after a 1 hour and 45 minute submarine voyage, Holland has surely turned heads. Though the U.S. Navy has not said anything official, it has sent a liaison to meet with Holland about his design.

“First modern novel” turned into tone novel in Germany
By Ivy Seager
Don Quixote has longed vexed literary critics who offer different interpretation for what author Miguel de Cervantes meant to say through his novel. Composer Richard Strauss will now offer his own interpretation through a tone poem, a musical movement that evokes the emotions and themes of a novel or story. Strauss’ tone poem is said to be just under an hour long, but will fully bring to life Cervantes’ highly critiqued work. Literary critics and music enthusiasts alike are looking forward to Strauss’ latest work.

Previous Issue

Next Issue