Mission Statement:
To endeavor to bring to all residents of the Five States the most current and important news from across the entire Five States region. Never yellow, the Five States Herald vows to serve only the people of the Five States, from New Austin to Lemoyne, free of charge now and forever.
Long time residents complain about lack of official support for the Five States also terrorize new arrivals
By Lucien Privitt
The abandonment of the Five States is not a new story. The region we all live in and love was abandoned first by Congress, then by the private investors who said they would make up for lack of Congressional support. The state governments, proudly rejecting the national government, promised the Five States would remain a place with plenty to offer those who who live here. Long time residents immediately began to complain, stating they have been dedicated to the Five States for years. “It doesn’t feel great to put so much of yourself into living in the Five States only for the powers that be to fuck off to who knows where and abandoned us,” said one resident. Others have remained optimistic as new arrivals continue to move to the Five States. The optimists believe that if the Five States remains a popular location the powers that be will change their mind. So the only hope is the continued growth of the Five States, which, while trending upward is far from guarantied.
This week a cowpoke who has not been in the Five States for but a few weeks complained that they cannot get anything done due to being attacked, hogtied, and otherwise harassed by those who have been here for years. “Those fellas have all the cool stuff, upgraded weapons, nice clothes, it’s clear they’ve been here awhile,” said the cowpoke, “I ain’t jealous, I am willing to work my way toward those things, but it’s impossible when I get attacked anytime I leave my camp.” Veteran cowpokes, they say, constantly attack them. Worse, this story is not unique. Similar stories are heard all over the Five States. Long time residents complaining about no official support attacking the one lifeline this region has in regaining support: new cowpokes.
Authorities in the Five States have cautioned against such behavior, as they would like to see the Five States receieve official support from the powers that be as well. However, they also acknowledge that they cannot prevent all crime. “I have a hard enough time preventing law breaking in my own town,” said Valentine Sheriff Curtis Malloy, “how am I to police the wilds of New Hanover?” Veteran cowpokes have advised to parlay with enemies. “You can typically negotiate an end to hostilities through parlaying,” said a veteran cowpoke offering advice, “aside from that, just keep getting better with your guns.” The Five States is, after all, a dangerous place and everyone who calls the region home has earned that right through sweat, blood, tears, and gunsmoke. Why would the new cowpokes earn their place any differently?
Large pack of coyotes has New Austin farmers concerned
By Jose Chavez
The natural world is one that humans share with animals. It is a delicate balance that has largely been tipped in the favor of humanity since the invention of the repeating firearm. Where in eons past humans had few physical advantages over wild beasts, now humans can kill a raging bear in a single shot. “This technological advancement cannot be understated,” said a naturalist, concerned with preserving animal life, “never before could humans rapidly kill animals they way they can now, and animal populations cannot keep up.” According to some, this tipped balance is just a hint at the danger to come. However, this week, one coyote pack in New Austin seems to have prospered in these conditions and may just be shifting the delicate balance back in their favor.
It is difficult to ascertain motivation, given that we do not quite understand animals. However, this large pack of coyotes seems to have happened upon a powerful strategy: ignore the humans and kill the cattle. The large pack, estimated to be nearly two dozen coyotes, has been killing cattle across New Austin. At least one farmer had to sell their property, having no resources to replace lost cattle. The pack operates at night and is described as relentless. Most farmers learn of the attacks too late. “I heard the commotion and came out with my rifle, got one of ’em, but the rest escaped,” one farmer said, “half my cattle killed or wounded.” Wounded cattle often have to be put down as infection sets in. Hunting parties are forming for night patrols for the large pack while naturalists groups are forming to thwart the hunting party’s goals.
Strange cave paintings draw attention
By Delphia Atwood
The history of the Five States is, in truth, not very well known. While recent history is not a mystery, the history of the Indians who lived here before us is scarcely known. Authorities have not dealt with the Indian tribes fairly and as a result, there is little trust for the U.S. government. Moreover, even if the Indian tribes trusted us to tell us more, U.S. authorities have shown little interest in actually learning about these tribes aside from how they could use them. There are a few hints of the Indian’s past and one such hint is a cave panting of hands in Ambarino. Several explorers and anthropologists have examined the paintings, but they cannot explain what they mean or if they have any actual use.
The tribe that lived in the area is the Wapiti. Now that curiosity about the paintings is high, many have suggested asking the Wapiti tribe what the drawings mean. However, the tribe has been missing for sometime. They fled the reservation area given to them by the U.S. government. Though many have claimed to see members of the tribe, their present location has not be found. For now, the mystery will continue.
Pack of Wolves Grow near Tall Trees!
By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
According to most hunters and locals, the bear is the number one feared animal in the Tall Trees region of West Elizabeth. Bears will appear without warning and attack without mercy if you don’t know what you’re doing. But it seems it’s not just grizzlies that you should be worried about now.
For weeks, there have been reports of a large wolfpack of sorts making its home among the trees. They are noticeably larger than your average wolves, and are said to be black as night. The sound of them howling in unison has been heard as far as Blackwater.
They have already claimed the lives of three hunting dogs and nearly taken the arm off a careless hunter. Expeditions to hunt and kill them have been attempted, but the wolfpack never seems to stay in one place for an extended period of time. Local law enforcement cannot spare anyone to assist, and the idea of contacting stationed US soldiers has been rejected. For now, it seems the steady course of action is to hope they move southward towards New Austin or northward towards Strawberry. Even the most gun ho of hunters, aren’t brave enough to face these predators on their own.
WANTED!
Investigators: Travel the Five States and report on what is going on.
Writers: Write the stories investigators find!
Photographers:
To take photographs to be used in the Herald.
Can also do all three!
Valentine Fire Strike
By Donna Deshner
This Saturday was a dark day for Valentine’s farmers. Indeed, in the early evening, an armed gang of three, according to witnesses, would have set the main street to fire and blood. It is estimated that there was dozens of victims but authorities refused to elaborate further, it is however obvious according to a young man present on the premises that it was committed by a notorious criminal organization from Scarlett Meadows, Lemoyne. “I was in Keane’s saloon when they arrived, as soon as I walked through the door there were gunshots all over town” told us the man. “Fortunately, they went to the other saloon, otherwise I would have died like Smithfield’s patrons”.
A Following negotiations with our experienced journalists, the man revealed more information on the identity of the attackers. “It was them, some fellows from Rhodes, an acquaintance of a friend of my colleague’s cousin told me about their methods, they always put things on fire when they attack, but I don’t remember their name though”. This fire strike as the inhabitants call it will stay in the memory of the survivors for their entire life, we pray for the injured of this tragic event.
Authorities finally reacted to the assault by advising the inhabitants to buy a rifle at the town’s gun shop to protect themselves if it ever had to happen again. “We ignore who committed this massacre and therefore we advise you to stay alert, evil is eating away at our city and we’re not going to let it pass, God bless America” said Curtis Malloy, the town’s sheriff, during his short speech to the press. Some booed him after his speech and called him sold, he didn’t want to answer our questions related to these accusations.
Centuries-Old Gun Saves Family!
By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
According to my best recollections, the Golden Age of Piracy ended 168 years ago. It stands to reason something created in that timeframe will not be of much use now. This assumption, it turns out, was proven false this week.
George Rackam is a sailor living in Saint-Denis; he is originally from Britain. His wife, Mary Critchett, is also from Britain; both were born in Bristol. Rackam had an ancestor who served as a privateer during the age of pirates; he supposedly fought off a boarding party with a blunderbuss. This very gun was a precious object handed down from the generations.
On Tuesday night, three local Italian criminals kicked in his door and tried to rob Rackams house. In the confusion, he bolted for the blunderbuss, threw in some spare coins, and pulled the trigger. The gun fired after a few seconds delay caused by the burning gunpowder inside the barrel. All three criminals were struck dead; the coins were so deep into the flesh that the mortician dug them out with a knife.
When asked how he felt using a centuries-old firearm to save him and his wife’s life, he jokingly admitted that it’s just a good weapon against unrequited invaders.
The Five States joins other states in protesting Congress’ intention to regulate drug labels
By Adam Parvey
Congress is looking to address damage caused by bad drugs. Doctors and their patients have reported unexpected side effects from drugs, including death. The results were determined to be bad quality products. “Drugs may not be mixed properly, or in some cases, mixed with cheaper ingredients,” said one regulator, “these cheaper ingredients have negative health consequences.” Several states have already protested such labeling restrictions, claiming local companies are under the purview of the states and not the federal government. Two states from the Five States have joined the protests with enthusiasm. The New Austin and Lemoyne state legislatures have sent letters to Congress, warning that they will not comply with labeling restrictions. “It is a very simple matter, for drugs manufactured within Lemoyne and distributed within Lemoyne, such federal restrictions cannot be applied,” said a Lemoyne state legislator, “and we will prohibit drugs from crossing state lines if we must to keep the federal government out of the business of Lemoyne residents.”
The New Hanovor and Ambarino state governments have not joined the protesting states. However, both legislatures have state clearly that they are watching potential Congressional legislation regarding drug label restrictions. While neither state has taken a position, they have indicated that they will act if legislation oversteps federal authority. West Elizabeth, meanwhile, is split. The state legislature has not made an official announcement and my sources say opinions are split between the north and the south. Legislators from southern West Elizabeth, which includes the city of Blackwater, largely side with Lemoyne and New Austin. Several southern West Elizabeth legislators have warned of an overzealous federal government “getting in the way of true progress.” Legislators in the northern region of the state, which includes the town of Strawberry, have taken a more measured approach similar to New Hanover and Ambarino, watching but waiting to see how far reaching potential legislation is before petitioning Congress.
The pressure across the nation has been significant. My sources close to a member of Congress has said talks about regulating drug labels is quieting, but not going away. “They are talking about it more, strategically, keeping discussion behind closed doors,” my source said, “when public opinion shifts in favor of restrictions, and it will, Congress will be ready to act.”
Mt Rainier National Park designated as 4th national park
By Frederick Vannesse
President Alfred MacAlister signed a bill early this month creating the nation’s fourth national park. The national park system, meant to protect and preserve wildlife from plants to animals. While American expansion has taken its toll on wildlife and demand for wood has harmed forests, action is now be taken by the federal government to be better stewards of the natural world. Indeed, part of the goal is to preserve these areas for their own sake, in addition to benefitting future generations. As a national park, private parties will be unable to exploit the resources of Mt Rainier without resulting in federal action. Many Americans are praising the protection of the natural world, with national parks becoming desirable vacation spots.
Confusion at the Vatican, Pope beautified again?
By Ivy Seager
Catholics across the world were very confused when the beautification of Pope Innocent V was announced. Once known as Peter of Tarantaise, Pope Innocent V would preside over the Papal States for a short period, dying just five months after taking office. Many of Pope Innocent V’s writings have become Church Canon and so despite his short lived time as Pope, his beatification did not come as a surprise. It was surprising to many, however, for another reason: Pope Innocent V may have been beautified last year. Catholics all over the world, including bishops and priests, have recalled learning about Pope Innocent V’s beautification last year. The Vatican has explicitly denied these claims, stating, “we would have records of such a beautification, and such records do not exist.” Despite the confusion, the announcement was still praised as Pope Innocent V is held in high regard.
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