Mission Statement:
To endeavor to bring to all residents of the Five States the most current and important news from across the entire Five States region. Never yellow, the Five States Herald vows to serve only the people of the Five States, from New Austin to Lemoyne, free of charge now and forever.
Authorities seek information about wagon thief
By Lucien Privitt
Several traders have filed complaints about a thief stealing their wagons. The thief in question uses bolas and some unknown strategy to completely avoid damage. “I think the fella is divine, but serves some kind of evil god,” said one trader, “I couldn’t quite perceive them, couldn’t aim at them, but they had no trouble hogtying me!” Several traders have reported similar attacks. In each case the attacker cannot be targeted and uses a bolas to knock them off their wagons before hogtying them. They then will ride away with the wagon or in some cases, blow the wagon up and leave the trader on the floor tied up. Because the victims have had trouble perceiving the attacker, there is little to go on regarding physical description. Some reports indicate the thief wears all black while some say they wear all white, and still others say they dress in bright colors in extravagant outfits. Authorities wonder if there is more than one attacker using these methods.
State lawmen have increased patrols across all five states, but authorities are asking for anybody with information on the thief or thieves to provide that information to local law enforcement as soon as possible.
Mexican army increases border patrols
By Alois Burditt
Tension at the southern border remains high. Rumors have escaped that Mexico may be nearing a civil war. United States authorities have done their best to secure the border, seeking to stop both immigration and emigration. Success has varied. Some folks have been successfully stopped at the border, though many continue to manage to sneak across. Mexico’s government has accused the U.S. of failing to secure the border. Some members of Mexico’s government has even alleged that the U.S. has chosen to not secure the borders, claiming the U.S. wants gunslingers to travel south to disrupt Mexico’s attempts to prevent civil war.
U.S. authorities have denied the allegations, announcing, “the border we share with Mexico is long and in parts, difficult to patrol and secure and the U.S. government continues to find new ways to secure our border.” One potential idea was to build a wall. While it may seem a bit strange today, walls were popular ways to secure towns and cities historically. A wall between countries may not be so strange. Critics have pointed out ladders and shovels are both easily accessible tools that would bypass a potential wall. Tensions will continue to grow as solutions continue to fail.
Another naturalist and hunter conflict
By Jane Duran
A naturalist nearly killed a hunter after their photograph was spoiled. According to the naturalist, they put out some bait to draw out the legendary Chalk Horn Ram. While they were waiting to take the perfect photo they heard a loud gunshot, followed by another. “I turned and saw a hunter hiding in some bushes nearby,” said the naturalist, “I turned back to quickly take the photograph, but the beast was dead.” The hunter was on their way to skin the beast when the naturalist rushed them. “We got into a fist fight, rolled on the ground a bit,” the naturalist said. The fight never turned fatal, as the pair threw a few fists before breaking apart.
“I was furious, but that damn hunter was right,” the naturalist said, “what’s done is done, so I left them to it.” The naturalist said he left quickly, not wanting watch the hunter skin the animal. “It was so beautiful, just wanted a photograph,” the naturalist said. Conflict between hunters and naturalists is not new and may very well be escalating. While many would suggest betting on the hunters, as they are armed and ready to use their weapons, I would not count naturalists out so quickly. They are not pacifists. And while naturalists may prefer to not kill animals, history has shown they are more than open to shooting their fellow man. So be warned if you think a naturalist will be an easy target and try not to be the subject of my next story of conflict!
Van der Linde gang in West Elizabeth?
By Nick McCrary
A rumor has started that the infamous Van der Linde gang is staying in West Elizabeth. The gang is led by Dutch Van der Linde, an outlaw who has robbed and pillaged for decades. The Van der Linde gang is a wanted gang, primarily for robbery charges. A hunter claimed to have seen a camp with nearly a dozen people. While scouting for animals with their binoculars, they saw the packed camp and observed for a bit. “I was certain that man looked like a wanted poster I had seen before,” the man said. He rode into Blackwater and reported what he saw. The local police were described as skeptical, but they did investigate.
They did find a camp in the area the hunter said, but it was far fewer people. None of the people at the camp were known members of the gang. Blackwater Chief of Police said, “it would not be very smart of the Van der Linde gang to be here, in a civilized city, so after our investigation, we are dismissing such claims.” The hunter was not convinced and told anyone who would hear that they were leaving West Elizabeth. “Staying where the Van der Lindes are is just asking to be robbed,” the hunter said. Blackwater residents were indifferent to the claim, neither reject or accepting it.
New jobs coming to the Five States!
By Adam Parvey
A lawmaker in the Five States let slip on Saturday that new investment money would make new employment opportunities possible. Residents of the Five States were ecstatic as word spread. Many speculated on what kinds of opportunities may be on their way. Gold panning, ranching, farming, and even lawman were among the ideas residents discussed in saloons across the Five States. The level of excitement following the announcements was higher than it has been in a long time in the Five States. However, a few skepitical residents pointed to the date: April 1st. April 1st is a date of infamy, one in which folks try to trick each other. Its origins are quite innocent. In the late 1500s, France changed to the Gregorian calendar after using the Julian calendar for decades. The Gregorian calendar changed the start of a year to January 1st instead of April 1st, as under the Julian calendar. For years after the change, many in France still celebrated April 1st as the new year. Residents using the Gregorian calendar mocked those people by calling them April Fools.
Now the tradition is to use the day to make other people look like April Fools. Which is what some suspected the lawmaker of doing when he accidently let slip that new investments were coming. “That damn fella making April Fools of us all,” said one resident. When confronted, the lawmaker turned red and laughed, admitting, “it was jut a bit of fun!” That ‘bit of fun’ ended in a violent event. Angry residents arrived at the lawmakers house and promptly set it on fire. The lawmaker and his family escaped and nobody was harmed, but their house was completely burned down. One participant in starting the fire said, “maybe this will just be a trick and all will be normal for him tomorrow, or maybe it won’t.”
Valentine doctor reports alarming rise in head injuries
By Emery Cosberry
Dr. Ben Calloway of Valentine has declared a rise in head injuries as a troubling sign. “I see a lot of injuries, and a lot of head injuries,” said Dr. Calloway, “but there has been a significant increase in folks suffering from commotion of the brain.” The increased number of head injuries comes at a time when several assault cases have been reported to authorities. Many of the doctor’s patients said a stranger came up to them and acted antagonistic. “This feller just started walking into me and flipping me off,” said one of the patients, “so I didn’t take their shit and shoved them, but the fight didn’t go my way.”
After waking up, the man headed to Dr. Calloway’s office due to a dizzy feeling. Witnesses could not confirm the fight despite the patient reporting the fight happening in public. Dr. Calloway said within a day he had over two dozen similar cases. Each time the patient was provoked into a fight. In some cases, witnesses were able to verify what happened. On one occasion, Valentine deputies chased an attacker off. “The worse part is I contacted some colleagues in other states, and they saw an increase in head injuries too!” said Dr. Calloway. While the provoked fights are certainly the cause, it is unclear why cowpokes are provoking others into fights. Authorities say the best way to avoid such an attack is to not give into provocations.
WANTED!
Investigators: Travel the Five States and report on what is going on.
Writers: Write the stories investigators find!
Photographers:
To take photographs to be used in the Herald.
Can also do all three!
English Demon Haunts Saint-Denis???
By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
To most people, the name Spring Heeled Jack means nothing. A silly little phrase and nothing more. To those of a certain age in London, it brings up nightmares. Spring Heeled Jack was said to be a creature that stalked women on cold nights. A monster that looked human, yet not of this world. He would claw people, breathe fire, and jump tall buildings.
Sightings stopped decades ago in London; many assumed that was the end of it. But now, there are stories of women in Saint-Denis being attacked by a strange man who always escapes the police. Many are wondering if the demon has moved to another land to spread terror.
A high society lady named Claudia gave the best description so far. She was attacked while walking home near the docks two weeks ago. The attacker appeared from nowhere, immobilized her with blue flame, and clawed her arms before the police arrived. His face was cracked like a doll; half of it looked normal, the other, inhuman. Police, of course, don’t believe in such creatures, and believe well-organized criminals cause the attacks. But look into the eyes of the victims, and you will begin to wonder otherwise.
Gun Merchants Flooding Five States
By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
You buy firearms from a gunsmith or shop; it’s perfectly legal. We have reported rumors that the seller in Tumbleweed might be doing things on the side, but the system has more or less worked.
In recent weeks, things have changed. A large influx of firearms has been showing up, with high-quality modifications that simply cannot be sold or made normally. This influx coincides with strange individuals appearing in cities like Saint-Denis and Blackwater. People who hide in allies, carry bulky outfits, and speak with a British accent of sorts.
These firearms are already becoming an issue; local sheriffs and police departments have reported a rapid increase in firearm-related attacks. Just this morning, the bank in Valentine was shot at with a rapidly firing pistol that is not sold in the Five States.
Nobody knows where these arms dealers are coming from, where they got these guns, and what to do about it. Arrest warrants for anyone carrying bulky clothing and having a sharp accent are, in effect, a move that will probably not survive a court ruling. Yet more problems to deal with; it’s another week in the Five States.
Life insurance company opens on April Fools Day
By Frederick Vannesse
North Carolina Mutual Life Insurance Company opened in Durham, North Carolina over the weekend. The opening would have been uneventful if it was not for the date of the opening. The company opened on April, 1st. By now many have celebrated April, 1st as April Fools Day. The informal holiday is celebrated by attempts to trick others. Generally, these tricks are light and in consequential. When the insurance company opened its doors on April 1st, many customers were not sure what to make of it. Insurance is still a business in its infancy and not a luxury most can afford. The idea is to make monthly payments to the company and then when you die, benefits are provided to explicitly stated individuals. Those benefits can pay for funeral expenses or make up for lost income when a family member dies unexpectedly. However, few have the money to pay for this insurance and those that do prefer the old mattress savings as a rainy day account. So when NC Mutual opened up, many thought it was a trick. Few customers signed up, thinking they would pay to start insurance and then the company would disappear. The company expressed some shock that a “fake holiday” would negatively impact business, but they expect to see more customers in the coming weeks.
Tensions increase around the island of Crete
By Ivy Seager
Crete has been beset upon by both Greek and Turkish forces. Crete was supposed to be provided autonomous rule based on provisions of the Congress of Berlin. The island, home to a large Greek population, was never given that autonomy. As a result, the people of Crete have rebelled three times in the last several decades. In an attempt to placate the Greek population, Sultan Abdul Hamid II appointed Alexander Karatheodori Pasha as governor of the island. This move upset the growing Muslim population of Crete and more unrest followed. Ottoman forces started to arrive on the island to support the Muslim population while Greek volunteers arrived in Krete to help the Greek population. There is concern that a war may begin very soon. The United States has not officially commented, but my sources in the government confirmed that the situation is being watched.
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