Mission Statement:
To endeavor to bring to all residents of the Five States the most current and important news from across the entire Five States region. Never yellow, the Five States Herald vows to serve only the people of the Five States, from New Austin to Lemoyne, free of charge now and forever.
Racer perseveres through multiple races and injuries to secure a top 3 finish
By Adam Parvey
The Five States Racing Association offered gold nugget bonuses this week for any racer to make it into the top three finish for any race. A task that proved tougher than anticipated by at least one cowpoke. “I figured it wouldn’t be too bad, just get on my good old shire and keep racing until I placed,” said Vance O’Conner, “so I kept at it, but it wasn’t easy.” Mr. O’Conner joined his first race the morning the challenge started and ended up at the end of the pack. “It was a learning experience, so I was ready to make my comeback,” said Mr. O’Conner. He explained that he started doing better, hitting turns, riding in the pack, and even started to overtake other racers. However, Mr. O’Conner said he learned the closer he got to the front of the pack, the more violent races got.
“Folks started elbowing me, in my ribs, in my face, the ladies were sometimes the most vicious of all!,” said Mr. O’Conner, “but the first time I made it into the top three and I took an arrow to the shoulder.” Mr. O’Conner was slowed down and dropped out of the top three, which mean he had to race again. After tending to his shoulder injury, Mr. O’Conner was racing an hour later. This time it was a bullet that slowed him down. “I was catching up to third place when he turned around and shot me!” Mr. O’Conner said. Mr. O’Conner fell off his horse, losing the race. He was seen by a doctor in Saint Denis, who advised him not to continue racing, but he was back at it hours later.
Over the next several hours Mr. O’Conner lost several races. He had bruises, cuts, scrapes, as did his horse. As day turned to night, Mr. O’Conner thought all was lost. However, despite his aching body and his horses wounds, Mr. O’Conner mounted one final time. “I can’t tell you what happened, because I don’t remember much,” said Mr. O’Conner who was on pain meds and alcohol at the time. Yet witnesses described him masterfully taking to the course, dodging strikes against him and even avoiding a shotgun blast. He made it into the top three. Then, the rider in first place shot the second place rider, which promptly crashed into the first place rider. The way was cleared and Mr. O’Conner rode his horse into first place! With his victory and gold nuggets secured, Mr. O’Conner passed out. He is now recovering, as his his horse. The doctor expects a full recovery, but it will take several weeks.
Man found dead hanging by his foot
By Alois Burditt
Authorities were notified a dead body hanging by its foot, just south of MacFarlane’s Ranch. The discovery was made by a couple of ranch hands who were hunting in the area. The hanging man was already dead when the hands found it. Upon investigation, it was determined the man was killed by a gunshot to the head. “It was a gunshot that killed him, no doubt,” said a New Austin Ranger, “but he was hanging from the tree before he was shot.” The man was hanging from what appeared to be a suspension trap, a hunting tool that many hunters look down on. The trap works be being anchored to a tree, with the trap itself hidden on the ground. It is then baited with food or something to draw the prey to the trap. Once the animal enters the trap, it tights around the creature and lifts it into the air, hanging it from the tree until the hunter comes to claim his prize.
“I find such traps to be unsporting,” said hunter Bartholomew Brown, “and worse, its damn near torture.” The animal can hang for hours, conscious and afraid. Such traps are popular among hunters who prefer not to track or otherwise work for their prey. The investigators said there was a pair of horse tracks they believe belonged to the killer that were spotted, but they do not believe the killer hung them up at all. “I think this lazy hunter got caught in his own trap,” said one New Austin Ranger, “and then a proper hunter must have stumbled upon him and showed him a bit of mercy, or frontier justice as it were and finished the man with a single shot to the head.” The body was taken down but no evidence was found to identify the deceased nor the killer.
Burned down building part of literal underground moonshine operation
By Jane Duran
Authorities were led to a burned down building by a panicking man. “A fella came into our office saying he started a fire,” said Valentine Sheriff Curtis Malloy, “said he had been drinking and snacked on a plant he learned to be poisonous.” Sheriff Malloy said the man said the plant made him throw up on a candle. “The problem was his throw up was full of alcohol he had been drinking,” Sheriff Malloy stated, which led to a fire. The Sheriff organized a rescue party when the man said at least one person, an elderly woman, may have been trapped in the fire. “The man explained the fire started in the basement and he fled in a panic, leaving someone behind,” Sheriff Malloy said, “I didn’t expect any survivors.”
The building was little more than smolders and scattered pieces. “It looked like a massive whole in the ground,” said one of the rescuers. In what was the basement they found remnants of casks and alcohol distilling equipment, explaining the explosion. Federal investigators were not notified about the incident because though it s likely an illegal moonshine operation there was no evidence to confirm it. They did not, however, find any bodies. “They did not find the elderly lady,” said Sheriff Malloy, “so she likely escaped, some old ladies are just to ornery to die, just ask my mother in law.”
Beloved Strawberry Man Alive!
By By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
For weeks the citizens of Strawberry had slowly come to accept that the beloved bar drinker Terry, born in a different land, was not coming back. He had up and vanished sometime ago; there had been a manhunt with no success, and not a word had been heard or spoken. Most believed he had died; perhaps it was murder or even suicide. There was a short funeral held, and slowly people moved on. But this may have all been quite premature, for a letter arrived on Tuesday from an unknown address.
It said the writer was good old Terry himself, alive and mostly well. He was sorry for leaving so abruptly, but he knew if he said anything, people would have wished he wouldn’t go. He had just moved on with his life, to new places and lands to travel. Nobody did anything wrong; he just felt it was time.
Some locals assumed it was fake or maybe a letter from his killer. But the letter came with a noticeable smell of alcohol, the same brand Terry had used to drink so many times. Many locals now agree, it’s sad he left, but we’re glad he’s okay.
Hunter claims pelt disappears
By Van R. Seldon
A hunter spent several days tracking the rare Knight Moose in the north region of Roanoke Ridge. Through cold weather, rain, and being stalked by wolves, the hunter persevered. Their tenacity paid off when on the third day, they found the majestic beast. The hunter then slowly approached the moos, raises their elephant gun and fired. The shot was clean and the moose went down. The hunter, who asked to remain anonymous so that, “those naturalists and soft folk don’t come a harassing,” them, then prepared to skin the Knight Moose and take their prize. And that is where it all went awry.
“I cut into the beast, pulling the valuable pelt off, respectively, of course,” the hunter said. As they tossed the heavy pelt over their shoulder, however, it completely disappeared. “Expecting a heavy pelt on my should I almost lost my balance when it suddenly wasn’t there,” the hunter said, “at first I figured it slipped from my grip but then I couldn’t find it anywhere.” The corpse of the moose remained, so the hunter knew they were not crazy. “Many said I must have never seen the moose but the carcass, the blood, it was all there,” the hunter said, “the only thing that wasn’t there was the pelt.” There were no tracks or anything else to suggest someone stole the pelt, the hunter just said it was gone.
Strangely, this situation was not unique. Several hunters have made similar claims. Anna Adair, a hunter who hunts in New Hanover and Ambarino, said she has had pelts disappear right before her eyes as well. “Honestly, I hadn’t thought to mention it until I heard of this other fellas story,” she admitted, “I wasn’t terribly eager to be called mad, but it has happened a few times you see, the pelt just disappears into thin air!” Most people who have investigated this situation have offered a likely explanation: the hunters are liars. The hunters, however, have said this is simply not the case. “I know it seems far-fetched, but in Five States, lots of things are far-fetched,” said another hunter, “many say to have seen their twin, though they never had a twin!”
One investigator, however, has offered a unique explanation: bugs. Abner T. Hamley blames an unidentified bug roaming the Five States. “Awhile ago the Five States became plagued with new and unidentified bugs,” Mr. Hamley said, “and one of these newly discovered species is involved.” Mr. Hamley described the bug as a piranha like insect drawn to the removed carcass. “I believe they prefer the part of the animal just beneath the fur, so a freshly removed pelt is like a juicy steak dinner for them,” Mr. Hamley said, “and they swarm silently and consume the pelt until there is nothing left.” The effect of this near instant consumption is, “the appearance of a disappearance!” according to Mr. Hamley. So far the only evidence of the bug is the disappearing pelts, but other investigators are joining the hunt to identify the bugs, but without support from authorities can they be eradicated?
Hungarian Alienist Struggles with the Past!
By By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax (Lead Correspondent)
We all have people in our family tree we aren’t proud of. I sadly know I’m related to a Confederate officer who proudly admitted he massacred surrendering Union soldiers, but that doesn’t define me. Who we are related to shouldn’t define us, but some people find it harder to let go of the past.
Nathália Noyes is a Hungarian alienist in Saint-Denis who specializes in helping troubled youth, often girls. It’s a profession she loves; helping children always makes her day. But it’s that job that she loves that also brings great distress, for it’s something a specific ancestor would take a dim view on.
For Ms. Noyes is related to countess Elizabeth Báthory. She is, of course, not the only person alive who’s related, but she’s closely related, from the countess’s mother’s side. She’s known this fact for a long time and even visited her native lands, in attempts to make peace with it.
She admits it’s sometimes painful, helping little girls and realizing her ancestor was murdering and torturing the exact same people. It’s not her fault she’s related, but the discomfort is real all the same. Noyes refuses to give up the profession; she just hopes one day, this unease will vanish into history, much like Báthory.
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Population surge in the Five States has residents divided
By Lucien Privitt
A population surge in the Five States has many residents concerned about the increased violence. In many ways, it is the same old story. More people come to the Five States and the increased population density leads rises in violence. It is a story that has now been told so many times that it is no longer shocking. What is shocking, however, is that the population has risen at all. “In the last year the Five States has been abandoned, more or less,” said a resident, “and yet, folks still come, so maybe there is hope?” For some residents, the rising population itself is what should be focused on, not the violence that surrounds it. “If people keep coming, and the powers that be see there is money to be made investing in the Five States, well, maybe the region isn’t quite as dead as we thought,” said another cowpoke, “maybe there is a bright future here.”
That hope, however, is held by only a few cowpokes. “It’s fool’s hope,” said another long time resident, “we need to keep our expectations low because investment here is over.” Many point to other investments that are much more lucrative, such as in California and New York. “The return on investment here will never match the return elsewhere,” said another cowpoke, “but the place will keep moving forward and on occasion, make some profits, just never enough.”
U.S. & Germany agree to divide Samoa between them after devastating typhoon
By Frederick Vannesse
The United States and Germany have been at opposing ends of a civil war in the Samoan isles. The tensions very nearly turned to war this week as the two nations’ fleets readied for battle. However, fate would intervene. A typhoon hit the islands and neither fleet was able to ride it out. Both the U.S. fleet and the German fleet were completely decimated. Several ships were carried out to sea and sunk by the powerful storm, leaving both nations with less power to project back at each other. With their tools of war destroyed, leaders from both nations met and used diplomacy to resolves the differences. Each nation took possession of one of the two Samoan isles with a peace treaty in place for the area. This has allowed both nations to focus on recovery, rescue, and clean up operations in the near future. Lost in this agreement, however, is what the Samoan people actually want.
Tensions grow in the Philippines
By Ivy Seager
It has been near a year since the U.S. has forced Spain out of the Philippines. U.S. forces opposed the colonization of the Philippines by Spain and during the Spanish-American war, pushed the Spanish military out. As part of the end of the war, Spain gave up its interests in the Philippines and the U.S. took over as a new colonial power. Though the U.S. claimed it was a temporary situation to help rebuild, there is no plan in place for a U.S. exit of the region. Locals, who once cheered the U.S. on are now looking at the U.S. as just another new master. Diplomats from the Philippines have met with U.S. forces, requesting that they leave the nation and let the Filipino people govern themselves while thanking the U.S. for what they have done. However, the U.S. has denied these requests, stating they do not believe the Filipino people are ready for self governance. One anonymous source stated that there is serious concern that if the U.S. leaves, Spain or another foreign power can come right back. Filipino diplomats have reportedly offered an alliance agreement, to invite the U.S. back if such a situation happened. The U.S. has remained unconvinced of making an agreement, however. Reportedly, some Filipino forces are preparing for war.
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