Mission Statement:
To endeavor to bring to all residents of the Five States the most current and important news from across the entire Five States region. Never yellow, the Five States Herald vows to serve only the people of the Five States, from New Austin to Lemoyne, free of charge now and forever.
Former canine mayor to live his last few days this week
By Adam Parvey
Five years ago a small town looked at the candidates for mayor and decided to diverge from the expected path. One candidate was described as angry and cantankerous, which distracted from their legitimate government experience. Their opponent had little government experience but was seen as a straight shooter, though they were said to have the intelligence of a box of rocks. Townsfolk simply could not make a choice between what one voter described was, “different shades of shit.” But a surprising candidate was put forward to challenge these two. His name was Magneto and he was in fact, a dog. Magneto’s platform was to leave people alone while at the same time, providing an endless amount love and kisses to townsfolk. The dog traveled across the town meeting with constituents, where he let them rub his belly and give him endless treats.
While many voters did express skepticism over electing a dog to political office, may could not deny the feeling of joy and optimism left in Magneto’s wake. Every time he left one place, people immediately wanted to arrange for his return. It was not just the dog’s presence that drew support, but his perseverance. Magneto suffered from seizures, having one per month. He also had to have both of his hind legs surgically repaired. Magneto is also linked to two legends of the Five States: the Chickasaw tracker Akanowa and the bounty hunter Nathaniel Cross. As Mayor, Magneto’s presence led to a revitalization of his town as folks had a leader they could love and be proud of. Magneto did not run for a second term and retired from politics.
In retirement, Magneto spent his days with his owners and his adopted sister Rogue, enjoy crayfish and spending warm days in his pool. This year Magneto even vacationed in the mountains, experiencing snow for the first time. Magneto was always a good boy and never once harmed a person or a dog. At 11 years of age, time has done what physical challenges could not, slow him down. The decision was made to give him a peaceful goodbye rather than force him to live through increased breathing difficulties and the coming hot summer, which he never liked. He has spent the week receiving visitors, which is said to have reignited his puppy like energy, for a little bit anyway. Magneto will be missed but his impact on those close to him will go on forever.
Dispute handled the old fashioned way
By Jose Chavez
The sun hung heavy over Tumbleweed as two men faced each other in the dust choked main road, eyes locked and fingers twitching. Locals had cleared the road, watching from porches and behind barrels, whispering tales of old vendettas and unpaid debts. One was a wiry bounty hunter known only as “Whip,” a ghost of the desert with a reputation for leaving his targets six feet under. The other, Elias Crane, was a rancher turned outlaw after the Bureau seized his land—tough, desperate, and deadly with a Colt. Nobody knew what words had been exchanged earlier in the saloon, only that it ended with both men stepping into the street with murder in their eyes.
The tension built for several minutes before both men reached for their guns and the silence was shattered. Two shots rang out, nearly as one. Whip staggered, clutching his shoulder, but his second bullet found its home. Elias dropped where he stood. As blood soaked into the dirt, Whip stood over the body, jaw clenched, then holstered his revolver and limped toward his horse. No lawmen came, as both men were very clear of their intent to settle their dispute. In New Austin, some grudges are settled quicker than a telegram—and the undertaker had another job before sundown.
Investigation into US Senator
By Jane Duran
Senator Roscoe Brody is under investigation for corruption. The Colter revitalization project has been covered in this paper for weeks, including the end of those plans. When it was exposed that friend of Senator Brody got butter deals for returns on their investment, the plan fell apart. Several Senators pulled their support immediately, with some saying privately that they did not want to be linked to Senator Brody at this time. The Senate is forming an ad hoc committee to look into the accusations. This is not a legal inquiry, and as a result, Senator Brody is not expected to serve jailtime. Depending on the findings, he could be sanctioned within the Senate or potentially removed completely. Removing a duly elected Senator is rare and controversial.
If Senator Brody is found to have broken laws, the findings may be sent to the appropriate body. That means it is still possible for Senator Brody to face a criminal investigation. Senator Brody continues to claim innocence.
Drowning death in Blackwater
By Odell Clifton
A body washed up on the shores of Flat Iron Lake early Tuesday morning, just east of the Blackwater docks—face down, bloated, and with no identification. Locals say they heard shouting near the water late the night before, but no one saw a thing in the darkness. The Blackwater police have yet to confirm whether the man drowned by accident or was helped under, though whispers around town lean toward foul play, especially given the bruising on his neck and the fact his pockets were turned out. For now, the lake keeps its secrets, and the undertaker keeps busy.
WANTED!
Investigators: Travel the Five States and report on what is going on.
Writers: Write the stories investigators find!
Photographers:
To take photographs to be used in the Herald.
Can also do all three!
Tobacco company seeks to buy land in New Hanover
By Emery Cosberry
A representative from the Commonwealth Tobacco Company arrived in Valentine last week, backed by investors and armed with maps, deeds, and promises of “progress.” Their aim is to purchase all the land stretching west of town, rolling hills, old pastures, and wild brushland, as part of a plan to establish a large-scale tobacco cultivation operation. The centerpiece of the deal includes the derelict remains of Lucky’s Cabin, now little more than scorched timber and overgrown weeds, and the still-occupied Downes Ranch. The latter, however, presents a problem. Thomas and Edith Downes have refused all offers, no matter how generous, citing a right to remain on land her late husband once fought to keep. “I plan to work this land until I am too old to do so,” Thomas Downes said, “then pass it to my own son, nothing good can come of selling what’s mine.”
The area is known for an abundance of wild Indian tobacco, a plant long gathered freely by travelers, trappers, and herbalists alike. If the sale goes through, fences will go up, access will be denied, and cultivation will be tightly controlled. Critics argue the company does not just want the land, it wants the monopoly on a natural resource that’s always been free to those who knew where to look. While Valentine’s mayor has remained silent, the general store has been a hotbed of argument, with ranchers, traders, and townsfolk alike weighing the cost of progress against the right to roam.
For now, the Downes Ranch stands as the lone holdout, which may be enough to halt the company’s plans. Rumors swirl that the company may seek other means to get the land, legal or otherwise.
Hunter arrested for public intoxication and harassing Saint Denis residents
By Emeline Vickroy
A hunter walked around Saint Denis, rifle in hand, looking around all corners of the city. Witnesses say that they even trespassed on private property as if they were pursuing something. “I asked them what it was they were doing,” said one person’s whose property was trespassed on, “and they just said searching for a legendary animal.” There are two such, so-called legendary animals that roam just north of Saint Denis: the sun alligator and the ghost panther. Animals that are rarely seen and even more rarely hunted, have taken up near mythical status among hunters. Successfully hunting one of these legendary animals is a way to show how skilled of a hunter one is. This hunter seemed intend on finding one in Saint Denis.
Not only did the hunter trespass on multiple properties, they also began harassing residents. They would ask endless questions about animal sightings and in some cases, even shove residents down as they chased after some phantom clue. Saint Denis police approached the hunter and though they were initially hostile, they did not resist arrest. No animal was found in Saint Denis that day, legendary or otherwise. And as there was no damage or injuries caused, the hunter was released the next day.
Murderous Machine Men Reported in Lemoyne Swamps!
By Sofia Kathleen Fairfax – Lead Correspondent
We are flesh and blood, stardust, billion-year-old carbon; we age and fall apart. The oldest among us can barely get beyond 100 if we are so fortunate. It’s why beliefs in men and women made of different components are so popular among dime novels, but perhaps some have taken dime novels too far.
In recent days, there has been a rise in reports of “metal men” coming out of the swamplands of Lemoyne, moving about in the darkness, approaching plantation homes, and startling both cattle and man.
One cowpoke claimed they saw a metal man attack a farm hand, crushing his skull with almost no effort. He shot at the creature but ran out of bullets before it could be killed. When help arrived, the machine was not there. It would be easy to chalk up such claims to misidentification; perhaps an alligator attacked the farm hand. Some large beasts are known to inhabit the area and can withstand many bullets. But so many other reports all describe the same thing: boxy humanoids with electronics attached to the body, which makes one just wonder if some individual or group of individuals has gone too far with playing God.
The Five States Herald 