Merchant loses supplies to attack
By Jose Chavez
A New Austin merchant faced a major setback this week when a group of outlaws attacked and destroyed their supplies. The attack was strange, according to law enforcement because nothing was stolen, just destroyed. “Usually outlaws like to to steal stuff, for themselves or to sell for money,” said a New Austin Ranger investigating the attack, “but in this case all the supplies were destroyed, blown up or set on fire.” As a result of the unique circumstances, investigators believe the attack was set up by a rival to the merchant. When asked about rivals and enemies, the merchant scoffed. “Rivals? Of course, I’m a merchant and in the free market, we are all rivals!” the merchant said. He provided investigators a list that was two pages long. “We will look for evidence that narrows the list,” said an investigator, “but if we can’t narrow it, we won’t be interviewing everyone listed.” Not great news for the merchant, but state police are already stretched thin.

Ambarino wolf population on the rise
By Jane Duran
To some, this story will be a tragedy and to others, a triumph of nature restoring natural order. A hunter did not return from their planned moose hunting trip. Those that new him had not heard from him nor seen him at his normal haunts. He was missing for for eight days but was found this week. His body was ripped apart and left unrecognizable by a large pack of wolves. The body was so ripped apart that it was unrecognizable. He was identified by the rifle nearby and the sidearm in his holster, both had his initials engraved.

Ambarino State Rangers have said the wolf population has exploded recently and it is not uncommon for packs of two dozen wolfs to chase prey in the snowy state. “Folks like to think having a gun means they are above nature,” said one ranger, “but that ain’t the case and to wolves, we are still prey if we are in their hunting grounds.”

Blackwater Saloon runs out of free snacks
By Odell Clifton
Drunks in Blackwater nearly started a riot over the lack of free snacks available at the Blackwater Saloon. “We had folks coming in all day just taking snacks, not drinking a thing,” said the saloon operator, “and so we ran out and when I told the regulars the snacks were gone, they weren’t happy at all!” The drunks demanded free food or free alcohol as a substitute, which was denied, eventually leading to the drunks getting rowdy. “They started tossing tables and chairs, breaking windows, and attacking other customers,” said the bartender. The drunks exited the saloon and crossed the street to head to the general store, saying they will get new snacks. However, before they could get there the local police intervened.

Blackwater police arrested the drunks, who despite being armed, were far too drunk to resist. “One reached for his gun but couldn’t even grab the damn thing,” said one policeman. The men slept off their drunkenness at the town jail.

Hunters have fun at a photographers expense
By Donna Deshner
Photography is a new technology that has become widely available to those with a modest income. Where hunters seek to take animals down for sustenance or profit, naturalists attempt to secure samples, photographers just want to take photographs of animals. Animal photographers take greater risks with their hobby, as both hunters and naturalists incapacitate their targets but photographers attempt to catch animals in all their glory and that requires them to be fully conscious. Photographers will spend hours watching an animal to get the perfect photograph. This week, a pair of hunters observed a photographer get themselves into a dangerous situation. “Fella was setting up to take a photograph of a bison but something went wrong,” one of the hunters said, “the camera thing seemed to not work, because he began staring at it, and then the bison charged!”

According to the hunters, the photographer noticed the charging bison in enough time to runaway. “We watched the chase for a good long while,” said one of the hunters, “poor sap nearly got gored.” The near gore was mostly a headbutt but had enough force that it sent the photographer to the ground. The photographer got up and managed to continue running away. The hunters finally had enough amusement and fired a couple of warning shots, which spooked the bison and saved the photographer. The photographer jumped on their horse and fled immediately.

Sickness spreading in Lemoyne believed to be from infected bats
By Mathilde Orry
A recent wave of sickness is being blamed on wild bats. The sickness presents with flu like symptoms but lasts for longer, with some cases lasting several weeks. Though fatalities related to the illness are currently low, older and malnourished individuals who contracted the sickness have died. Doctors have blamed bats local to the area as spreading the disease. Most people who have contracted it have in fact spent time in regions with the bats and so far, nobody has contracted it outside of Lemoyne. Doctors are troubled however that some of those who have contracted the illness have no been around bats at all, suggesting the illness may be able to be transmitted between humans.

Not taking any risk, Lemoyne authorities have offered gold nugget bounties on wild bats. Hunters have been quick to respond to the bounty and dozens of bats were turned in within the first hours of the bounty going live. The dead bats will not be disposed of immediately, but studied to confirm the disease came from them and find a way to combat the sickness.

Maryland sees record rainfall
By Frederick Vannesse
Maryland receives over a foot of rain during historical downfall. The official measurement was 14.7 inches. The torrent of rain causes problems for travelers, turning secure roads into muddy paths. Several horses stepped into deep holes hidden by the over one foot of water, leading to injury. While Maryland officials warned travelers from using the flooded roads several people ignored the advice. Few could have known it was going to be a record downfall when they set out, assuming it was just a bit of rain they could handle like they have done in the past. The rain is often thought of as an inconvenience, but in large volumes can be quite dangerous. The Maryland rain storm lasted a full 24 hours but no casualties were reported.

The Hague Conference ends with historic agreement
By Ivy Seager
Tsar Nicolas II called together several world leaders to find peace. They set out to limit the building of armaments, codifying rules of war, and establishing a means of peaceful conflict resolution. At the end, the leaders were unable to come up with guidelines for limiting the construction of armaments of war. Many leaders seemed far too distrusting to reduce weapon construction and trusting others to do so as well. The Conference was successful however in establishing rules for war as well as guidelines on peaceful conflict resolutions. In total, three resolutions were adopted: a process for peaceful resolution of conflicts, rules of war governing land and naval conflict, and the adaptation of Geneva Convention principles to naval warfare. Leaders hope this will lead to more cooperation internationally and a more civilized expression of war.

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