New Austin

Another week, another horse theft.
By Alois Burditt
Another horse has been stolen near Tumbleweed. Last week I told you the news of Mr. Debus, who was hung for horse theft. This time, however, there is no happy ending. The horse thieves made their move quickly when most of the hands had gone into town for lunch. By the time the theft was realized, the thieves were gone, having rode off into uninhabited regions of New Austin. Sheriff Freeman takes the theft as a personal insult and has vowed to capture the horse thieves, likely by hiring wandering cowpokes to hunt them down.

Tragic drowning.
By Alois Burdett
An attempted expedition into Mexico has failed. With no shared land borders between Mexico and New Austin, a few adventurous cowpokes set out for a ride across the San Luis River. One cannot say that they were not prepared. They ensured their steeds were as well rested as they were, and provided their horses stimulants to make the long swim.

At first, everything seemed to be going well. The horses were calm and the riders were hopeful. At some point, the horses were spooked by something in the water. The riders lost control as the horses scattered and shook the riders off of them. The only survivor had a stroke of luck, his for was caught in his horse’s stirrups. While he nearly drowned himself, he survived because his horse drug him to the shoreline. The other horses soon joined him, but his friends were gone, claimed by the San Luis River.

West Elizabeth

Jailbreak attempt in Strawberry leaves many dead
By Ela Q. Asken
A failed jailbreak left many Strawberrians dead. Early in the morning a shot rang out from the Sheriff’s office. The first deputy who responded was killed immediately with a shotgun blast to the chest. What followed was a shoot out as a recently arrested drunk was sprung from jail.

The three men attempting to breakfree their friend almost got away with it. Unfortunately for them, a traveling cowpoke came into Strawberry and intervened. While the criminals were engaging the deputies the stranger fired three quick shots and put them down in short order. While the residents were happy to have the altercation finally end, many openly asked if the mayor’s campaign against alcohol is worth it. Two Strawberry citizens, a deputy and the sheriff all lost their life over a drunk being sprung out. Perhaps he shouldn’t have locked up in the first place, many have commented.

Bizarre creature spotted in Flat Iron Lake.
By Ela Q. Asken
Just off of the Blackwater docks an unknown creature surfaced in front of several confused onlookers. A traveling cowpoke named Erin had been prepping her portable camera to take scenic shots of Flat Iron Lake when the creature surfaced. “It was massive. Beautiful and frightening at the same time!” she said of the creature. She had the time to shift her camera’s angle to snap a picture of the beast.

It was described as larger than a buffalo, having a long neck, and humps or ridges on its back. The creature swam on the surface for only a few moments before returning to the depths of the lake. If there are any other sightings of the Flat Iron Monster, contact the Herald immediately.

Ambarino

Home invasion gone wrong.
By Caylen V. Hornby
A bandit attempted to take advantage of an old man living alone in on the shore of O’Creagh’s Run. The old hermit, named Hamish, had just returned from a fishing trip and had removed his prosthetic leg (his souvenir from the war). The invader came in wielding a single sawed off shotgun, and upon noticing a one legged old man far away from his gun, relaxed a bit.
Hamish’ horse Buell neighed and bucked outside, sensing something was wrong. The bandit was distracted long enough for Hamish to grab his prosthetic leg and knock the shotgun out of his hand. Even with one leg Hamish proved to be more than a match for the bandit, who froze once he was disarmed.
Not being one for needless killing, Hamish tied up the man and rode him into Annesburg where the local sheriff took possession of the criminal.

Daring canoe ride down Donner Falls
By Jane Duran
World renown defier of death Ancel Patch rode a canoe down all three stages of Donner Falls. Mr. Patch crafted the canoe himself from a single piece of ash wood. He carved it specifically for this ride, designing to take long falls.
Many bet against Mr. Patch’s survival, but survive he did. The wild ride did not last very long to onlookers but Mr. Patch said that, “the moments between falls lasted forever, like time slowed between drops.” His canoe was battered but held until the very end.

New Hanover

Murder in Annesburg.
By Salem Makintosh (Freelancer)
Citizens of Annesburg were startled awake in the early morning after hearing multiple gunshots. A few brave residents followed the sound of the gunshots, which lead to a horrific display. Jacob Cross, a retired silver miner from Argentina who was visiting family, was found in the polluted water with six bullets in his body, he died on scene before the sheriff could arrive with his last words being reported by the first to arrive were, “don’t trust him…nothing but a wolf in sheep’s clothing.” Eye witnesses state that Cross was with a former colleague from their old company before the shooting occurred. Our investigators are looking into this man’s location for questioning.
Another silver miner named Jamie Hendricks was arrested in Saint Denis on unrelated charges, however they may have a connection to the victim as they arrived in the United States and I the same time. Any information leading to the identity of the killer should be reported to the Annesburg Sheriff’s department. Informants will be rewarded based on what is provided.

Ritual suicide more than it seems?
By Emery Cosberry
A group of daring individuals met at Flatneck Station with the purpose of jumping off of the Bard’s Crossing bridge. They have no way to prevent their falling to the ground but do not believe they will die. They are the “Respawners” and I have come to learn of their secretive ways.

These individuals do not see hitting the ground at tremendous speeds as the end of their life, but simply a short phase of it. “This is how we ascend, just like how the Salmon ascends the river to spawn. Only we ascend to respawn.” According to adherents, their death is only temporary. No matter how they die, they are spawned back into the world as if they never died at all. This is the “respawn” moment that gives the group their name.

“Most folks got no idea that we live in a false world. Everyone dies and respawns, just we Respawners know it!” Most people, according the Respawners, forget that they ever died. And worse, they forget that others have died even when they watch the death happen. “Why you think fellers go on rampages? They kill a feller and got no idea why they keep coming back. They don’t understand it and go crazy and start shooting everyone they see!” The purpose of jumping off the bridge is to have a dramatic death before returning to the world unharmed so there can be no doubt of the Respawning. One of the Respawners claimed I spoke to him both before and after his jump, though I do not recall speaking to him the first time. And I never forget a face!

Bizarre light show
By Van R. Seldon
Far north of Annesburg, northwest of Brandywine Drop, there was a bizarre light show. Passengers on the train reported bright lights and lightning striking the forest. A bizarre building occupies the area where the light show was reported. Unfortunately, nobody was home to answer my questions and so the nature of the bright lights and lightning will remain unknown for now.

Lemoyne

Catch as catch can taking nation by storm!
By Rutherford X. Downing
A new physical competition is taking the east coast by storm. Originating in England, catch as catch can wrestling is a physical grappling demonstration, where the two competitors attempt to out grapple each other. It is similar to the popular Greco-Roman wrestling, but catch as catch can allows a wider range of grapples, many of which are below the waste.

This week a wrestling show featuring the impressive Le Colosse (The Colossus), real name Pierre Pons, graced Saint Denis at the Théâtre Râleur. While not the typical type of entertainment seen in the Saint Denis theater, attendees were quite satisfied. Le Colosse competed against a much larger man called The Monster Among Us (keep in mind that Le Colosse is no small man himself). The crowed ooo’d and awww’d as the Monster flung El Colosse around, until El Colosse wrapped his muscular arms around the Monster’s waist.

El Colosse used his superior movement speed to circle the Monster all while holding the grapple tightly around him. Once positioned behind the Monster, El Colosse grunted and lifted the large man into the air before pulling him back down and slamming him to the mat. The Monster never stood back up and the crowd cheered for the victorious El Colosse.

Crayfish festival underway
By Mathilde Orry
A man in Lagras named Thomas has started the first annual Crayfish festival, to be held for an entire two weeks. “Folks don’t know how good crayfish is, this their chance!” says Thomas. Thomas has lived in the bayou his entire life and regularly wades into the alligator infested swamps to set traps and remove crayfish.

As I sat at a table covered in large scraps of paper, including rival newspapers, one of Thomas’ assistants dumped a pile of cray fish that had been boiled with red potatoes, sausages, and a whole lot of seasoning. Thomas taught me how to twist the head off and suck the insides out of the crayfish. “It don’t seem normal to you, but s’okay, you like it soon enough I bet.” The taste and texture took some getting used to. But I think I’ll be stopping by again before Thomas’ Crayfish Festival comes to an end.

Across the Nation

New York City expands!
By Adam Parvey
New York city has been expanded. A recently passed bill has allowed New York city to annex the nearby territories and form five new boroughs. These distinct boroughs in New York City will be much like America herself. Diverse and yet whole.

Will Pinerough has died.
By Adam Parvey
Mr. Pinerough served as the 4th President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. The Church expanded after the death of its founder, when Moses Young moved most of the church members to the Utah territory and founded Salt Lake City. While many Latter Days Saints Presidents petitioned for statehood, it was Mr. Pinerough who finally saw it through.

His greatest contribution was ending polygamy within the Church. Congress was reluctant to grant statehood to Utah while polygamy was widely practiced and legal. Banning the practice was enough to get Congress to approve Utah for statehood in 1896. The death of Mr. Pinerough will be felt throughout the Church of Latter Day Saints and Utah residents alike.

The World Abroad

Belfast lawman to stand trial for murder.
By Ivy Seager
Rarely does government move quickly, but Justice has been held off for quite some time in this case. 21 years ago a Belfast lawman opened fire on a Catholic widow, killing her. The woman, who according to locals who remember the story, had lost her husband only ten years earlier in the Fenian Rising. He was shot and killed fighting for a free Ireland, a sentiment many in this country can get behind.

Nearly on the eve of his death a disagreement occurred, the details of what happened are mostly lost to time. Some say there was thrown fruit, some say just thrown insults, but how it ended was clear as day, the widowed mother was dead. What became of her daughter is unknown. Locals looked for her but she was never found. The British Government and the Royal Ulster Constabulary delayed the case from going to trial as long as they could. This has led many to believe the orphaned girl was silently dispatched by the powers that be, though there is no evidence that something that nefarious occurred.

New ‘escalator’ proves overwhelming.
By Humphrey Harker
The prestigious store Henry’s of London has installed a new device that combines the old fashion staircase with the recent invention the elevator. For those who are untraveled, an elevator is a contraption that lifts people in a box up using a series of cables and pullies. The people stand in the box as they are lifted or lowered. The ‘escalator’ seeks to move more people without packing them into a small room. Instead, the stairs themselves move while the passengers stand still, as bizarre as that sounds! Passengers traveled at a 2 miles per hour to the second floor of Henry’s. Those who rode the escalator described the experience as, “overwhelming.”

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